Audio: here
I don’t think you’re ever there. You might never arrive, but if you do, you might as well quit because you’re already there. Can’t get any better. And as players, if you ever have that moment—you should never have that moment. You’re always trying to get better. –Tiger Woods
Skaters start young
Skaters need to come into their skills early in life. Physically they can be ready for triples at an early age with improved technique, innovative coaching and stellar role models.
Mentally, skaters are put in to difficult situations from the start. They are placed in front of judges, and an audience. They compete with their friends for medals, for skills, for the attention of their coaches.
While skaters are young, they will imitate and do what you want them to do without question to please parents or coaches.
Am I good enough?
Around 10 or 11 years old, athletes start to really think for themselves. They see the world in new ways. They start to doubt and question.
They start to compare themselves to others in practice and at competitions. They evaluate their skills against their idols and question whether they will be good enough to reach their dreams.
They begin to question if all the hard work they are putting in, all the physical pain and mental frustration are worth it.
Skating stops being play “fun” and starts being “work,” and the fun comes from the satisfaction of a job well done. They naturally start to wonder, “What’s in it for me?”
Socially, their friends stop inviting them to social events because they don’t want to be rejected for skating again. True friends are hard to find and harder to keep with your busy schedule.
Is this all worth it?
This is an important time, one of the many crossroads for skaters on the elite competitive track. And youth athletes (even up to young adults) have little experience and tools to help them manage themselves over the long haul towards their dream goals. Many of which take 6-10 or more years to reach.
The biggest change you can make
Here’s one important change in perspective a parent and athlete can make that could mean the difference between a promising career cut short or a life long satisfaction in a journey traveled.
You will always be a wonderful work in progress.
You will never get it done.
You will never be complete.
Yikes, you say, that sounds terrible. Nope, it is the most exciting thing you will hear today.
You never get it done because once you meet your dream, there will always be a new dream to take you even farther. You will always want more, you will always be capable of more:
- When you finally land consistent double axels, you will want to get your triples consistent.
- When you reach nationals, you will want to win nationals.
- When you skate your first international competition, you will want to win internationally.
- When you get third place in a major competition, you will want to be the champion.
- When you are the champion, you will want to repeat or even three-peat as champion.
You will never reach your “ultimate” goal. Because you won’t really know what your “ultimate goal” is.
You will never be finished, never be perfect. No matter how many “dream goals” you reach. Because finished means you are done and there is nothing left for you to strive for. It’s the same as being dead.
Live the journey
When you accept this truth, you can leave expectations of perfection and completion behind you.
Be free to explore, be imperfect and incomplete.
You are a wonderful work in progress.
Dream your dreams, make your goals, make a plan, and then pay attention to the journey.
Live. Learn. Grow.
Wherever you end up will be where you are supposed to be, and it will be better than anything you could ever dream for yourself.
To build a strong mental game you need to learn the techniques and practice them over time. You need to do this consistently, every day, on and off the ice. Over time this mindset will become natural. Then it will be there for you when you need it.
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